Month: March 2020

A creepy, atmospheric, dark horror film, my favorite kind. Incredible cinematography and acting. To be primal: Cosmina Stratan is hot. If you enjoyed this film, come walk through it again with me, it will be fun though possibly bloody >:)

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IMDB gives this as the storyline: Norval’s life has been, to put it lightly, difficult. Currently living home with his mother, the troubled young man is coming off alcohol-related struggles. So when he receives an unexpected letter from his estranged father requesting a visit, Norval catches a bus up to his dad’s secluded and scenic waterfront home. Maybe reconnecting with his father will give Norval the emotional fulfillment he’s been lacking. Before long, though, he notices something off about his dad, an uneasy feeling triggered by inappropriate comments and a possible over-dependence on booze. Norval quickly realizes that his hope of father/son bonding is doomed. Instead of a family reunion, he finds himself in a waking nightmare.
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Elijah Wood alone is a major reason to watch this film. He wins for worst haircut and neck tattoo in an ensemble but we all like watching him, so if you haven’t seen it yet, give it a watch. If you have seen it, you may agree or disagree with my take. Please leave a comment explaining what you liked or disliked about my review. I have multiple places you can reach me: rileyonfilm.com, Riley on Film my Facebook Page, or Riley on Film on Twitter. To divide up my many thoughts on this film, I offer this: This film works as a horror because of its 1) director, 2) star quality, and 3) well-placed hardcore violence that is borderline comical (because it’s so graphic).

First, the director Ant Timpson. As a horror fan you will recognize the movies he’s made: “Turbo Kid” and “Housebound” to name just 2. I think the big actors in this probably took the role because of this avant garde director. He knocked the ball out of the park with this one. There is usually a comedic element to his films but they are intense and often scary (I don’t know how scary I would rate Turbo Kid but it’s graphic). So now that you know the director is established and talented, let’s look at the stars in this film.

Who can think of Elijah Wood as any character other than Frodo Baggins? I sure can’t. He plunges earthward though in this film, showing he has the chops to do much more. I hope we see him in more horror. In 2012 he starred in “Maniac” which holds its own with fans as a solid slasher horror. Let’s hope he keeps on the horror tip. But he’s not the only star quality in this film.

Stephen McHattie is becoming known for a lot of Typecast roles. This is for good reason because I plays the scary old emaciated man role well! He is the DJ in the indie horror modern classic “Pontypool.” He’s great in that and delivers a class act performance as what I will call “the original dad” in “Come to Daddy (Gordon). His gravelly voice and visage make the scenes come alive with suspense and horror. All that is prior to “the fork scene” where a Thai actor is emasculated with the rustic utensil. This is one of the most violent kill scenes I’ve encountered in recent years. I suppose a worse one is done with a straight razor down Brian Cranston’s character’s arm in “Drive.” But I digress. But that brings me to the third viable element in this film: the well-placed violence.

In addition to the soon-to-be-famous fork killing, there is a partial decapitation that should have audiences squirming. IMDB labels this a comedy as well as a horror but I think that would only apply to the black comedy label. These are brutal kills. They’d fit in the context of the story though.

In conclusion, I hope you see and agree with me these three attributes make the film a must see for horror fans. I gave it a 6/10. Where it lost points were in the long spaces between kills and other milestones of the plot which were lagging a bit. It could have had more exposition of the characters of it could have just been shorter.

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IMDB is being harsh to this film giving it a 4/10. I really liked it! I gave it a 6/10. I thought the house was creepy, the story was just so so but it worked for me, keeping me repelled and attracted in equal measure.
You can listen to my full podcast review at RileyOnFilm.com and watch my review on Youtube

Below is an unedited word for word transcript of an audio recording. It is included just for meta purposes. There are no corrections or punctuation additions.

Okay, this film is called the girl on the third floor and I really liked this movie it didn’t do very well with the critics on Internet Movie Database it’s sitting on a 4 out of 10 but I really liked it and I think they’re being a little bit too classic story is you have Don Koch who was played by C Punk who is somebody I wasn’t familiar with but apparently he’s an MMA award-winning medal winning fighter I don’t really follow that sport so I don’t know him but as I was watching it I could tell that he was probably established in something else before he became an actor because his body was covered with tattoos but he’s trying to renovate a rundown mansion with a sordid history for his growing family only to learn that the house has other directors is Travis Stevens and he’s known mostly as a producer he was the producer of Buster’s mal Hart which I haven’t seen but it appears to be a horror movie so I think I need to see that especially since I like this film that Travis Stephens directed but Travis Stephens is mostly a producer let me read some of these credits maybe you’ve heard of them mohawk that was an awesome horror movie Busters mal Hart I just mentioned 68 kill xxxx 24 by 36 a movie about movie posters that sounds fine we are still here that’s a horror movie starry eyes I really like that horror movie as well so he’s done a lot of stuff cheap thrills was an amazing kind of horror suspense gore big ass spider the Thompsons the aggression scale what fun we were having zombie diaries – so he’s done let’s look at a few of the cast I’ve already mentioned CM Punk let me just leap read his little blip because I think he’s quite interesting how he came from MMA to actually be in a horror movie Philip Jack Brooks better known by the ring name CM Punk is an American mixed martial artist comic book writer and former professional wrestler he’s best known for his time in WWE where he’s recognized as the sixth longest reigning WWE Champion of all time Punk began his professional wrestling career on the American independent circuit and it goes on and on it lists a lot of accolades he did a good job and I enjoy take a look at the plot first a deeply flawed ex lawyer named Don Koch seeking a new start in life purchases a rundown old house in the suburbs of Chicago with the intent of fixing it up to provide himself and his pregnant wife Liz a new life away from the city he moves into the home ahead of her along with his dog Cooper determined to begin renovating without professional help he learns through his neighbors that the house has a sordid past and begins experimenting supernatural events within the home and it is kind of creepy because there’s this one very attractive actress who keeps coming up to talk to him while he’s working on things seemingly flirting with him but you don’t really get that for a while but when she starts full-on just asking to sleep with him he can’t resist so this is actually a major flaw in this character because he keeps communicating back with his wife who is pregnant about nine months pregnant and he’s insisting upon doing the work there all by himself so you think he’s kind of the man with all the tattoos and everything which is when I knew he probably wasn’t just a regular actor but maybe a crossover person somebody like Henry Rollins because actors don’t generally tattoo their whole body well sure enough I was correct and it’s a sea Punk who we’ve talked about who was a WWE ne…

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This film entrances the viewer through colors and filters but falls short of the original’s impact. I did find the film enjoyable, just in a different way.  Jacob Singer (Michael Ealy) is a medical officer in the Afghanistan war. For those who recall 911, these wars followed in response to terrorism. It is a war even millennials can probably  recall. But that is the only updated theme from the original. This new film is its own animal, that’s for sure. Many reviewers have noted it wanders far off from the original but that doesn’t mean it was bad to wander. He seems responsible and strong which are clearly needed in this hell of a place. Events transpire that send him home but he can’t shake the fact that he saw his dying (or dead) brother before leaving the war for home. It’s evident how much horror is in war but it seems something more intense is afoot, Jacob’s mental health or a drug it’s not quite clear.

(Read the rest of this review at Horror News Net along with my other published horror reviews)

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